Reoccurring Deaths
by RukaKurokawa
Summary: Kenny kills himself every day, trying to separate himself from the rest of his friends. His friends, having enough of his act, appoint Stan to protect him from himself. Now with Stan as his 'bodyguard', Kenny has to decide if it's all really worth it. Will he continue to kill himself for separation, or will he try to live for them? StanxKenny [Stenny]
1. Familiar Sounds

**Hello everyone~ It's Ruka once again!**

**I wrote this story a while ago, and I decided to post it to see if it would attract any attention. I've only wrote a few chapters, so as long as it gets more attention, I'll write more.**

**Stenny doesn't get as much love as it deserves~ [Although, it does get a decent amount, it's still not enough!]**

**This chapter's more of an introduction, that's why it's so short.**

**Remember to review if you want me to continue!**

**Warning:**

**Yaoi and cursing included.**

**Disclaimer:**

**I don't own South Park!**

_**[Chapter 1 - Familiar Sounds]**_

* * *

It's been a year now. Everyone had gave up on getting me to talk after the first few months, they just accepted the fact that I was staying silent. They knew no one could help me, I couldn't let anyone help me. My fate wouldn't let me.

I die every day now, the next day I'd always return, they noticed about three months ago. I wonder if I'll run out of lives one day?

This cycle of everyday life only repeats itself, that's what it's bound to do. Even the snow never melts, the only thing that changes is the time that passes.

Someone, please press stop.

"Kenny! At least blink!" What? I unconsciously blinked in surprise. "So you at least heard that. Dude, I seriously thought you were dead, but you were breathing..."

Stan? Why... why do you have a worried look in your eyes?

"You're getting worse, aren't you?" Of course Kyle would be the one to notice...

They're all looking at me, their eyes are piercing me like knives... I can't stand their looks...

I ran away from them. As I was running across the street, the light turned green, skipping the yellow. I smiled when I heard the familiar sound of a truck beeping. How expected, only something abnormal like this would happen to me.

I couldn't help but feel grateful that they couldn't see my smiling face. Yet, the tears fall down...


	2. Proving Assumptions

**I decided to post the next chapter because someone actually added this story to their favorites. So thank you SEDDIEVER~**

**This chapter's short, and just a setup for the next chapter, but whatever.**

**I wrote a few chapters to this a while ago, and I didn't type them. They ended up coming out really short. That shall be my warning for upcoming chapters, they get a little longer though.**

**Anyway, review for more chapters to be posted faster~ And for me to write more chapters...**

_**[Chapter 2 - Proving Assumptions]**_

* * *

I awoke in bed once again. However, something was off. There was another presence. I opened my eyes and looked around the room. My eyes stopped on Kyle, who was sitting in a chair. Once he noticed I was awake, he took the chance to speak.

"Kenny, I want to talk." It's not really surprising he was the one sent to talk to me. Out of all of us, he's the one that's most like a chick after all.

Taking my usual silence as a sign to continue, he did so. "What happened yesterday only proved my assumption." He paused. "We decided it's about time we helped you, something you've needed for a while now."

'We'? Then how come you're the only one here?

"I know what you're thinking, but it's not like that. You know Stan's not good in these situations, and Cartman... I don't have a reason for Cartman.

Typical.

"Kenny?" He placed his hand on my shoulder.

No... No one can help me. If anyone cared about me, then...

I jerked away from his grip. Now keeping my distance, I glared at him.

I can't let them get too close...

"Kenny, what's wrong?" He looked at me and sighed. "I had hoped we wouldn't have to do this..."

Do what?

With that, he left the room. I guess I have to wait until tomorrow to find out. It would be nice to rest beforehand though...

I walked over to my dressor and pulled out a gun from one of the drawers.

So many memories with such a simple object...

Then I pulled the trigger.


	3. No More Suicide

**First of all, I shall thank 'Guest' for reviewing. It made me remember I hadn't updated this in a while.**

**Extreme shortness. Wew, and I thought _Just Someone's Toy_ was getting short...**

**Well, the next chapter is a lot longer. Then I actually have to start writing again, which I'd most likely type this time. Hopefully it'll become decent length, and not just this.**

**Don't forget to review! It makes/reminds me update!**

_**[Chapter 3 - No More Suicide]**_

* * *

When Kyle had said something about 'not wanting to do this', I never thought he meant something like this...

* * *

_"I'm watching you. If we continue to leave you alone, then what has been happening will only get worse." What, so now they're making Stan my babysitter? "So no more suicide, Kenny."_

_No more suicide? I glared at him. How is he supposed to stop me from that? One person can't change anything._

* * *

I thought that, but Stan can do a lot more than I thought. He even found all the weapons in my room! I don't need weapons to die though, I have other ways.

He seems so determined to keep me alive though. That would only mean... he cares.

Stan can't care about me, no one can! My fate is death, a reoccuring one. If anyone cares about me, then my deaths would only make them upset. The only way I can keep them happy is to slowly drift away from them. Then eventually, I'll be gone, and no one will care anymore.

The tears returned without my realization. Before I could grasp what was happening, I started sobbing.

Stan saw and didn't ask questions. He just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry into his jacket.

Why does he have to care about me?


	4. Red Fades To Black

**Thanks for reviewing other 'Guest'~**

**Sorry that it takes me a while to update this, at least it's not abandoned though, right?**

**Enjoy the chapter~ Also, please don't forget to review!**

_**[Chapter 4 - Red Fades To Black]**_

* * *

I didn't die yesterday; it was the first day in months. I can't help but feel a little happy because of it. Although, I know my living streak won't last long, death is bound to return again.

Stan, being proud his efforts were succeeding said that today we'd do something fun. His reasoning was to celebrate my full day of living, and to cheer me up.

Now, he's sitting on my floor trying to decide where we should go. I don't get how he's been able to stay in my room this entire time, I mean, it's so small... Well, still better than sitting in the living room with my family.

"I've got it!" It's about time, it's been almost an hour now. "Isn't there a fair or something today that those hypnotizing Earth day people were setting up?"

No, not _those_ people!

"Kenny, is something wrong? You look a little freaked out." Oh right, they don't remember most of my deaths, they've just been so often recently that they were able to. That means he doesn't remember those crazy people cutting off each one of my limbs...

Uh, he's still looking at me, I don't know what to do... I shook my head as a response to try and get him to look away. Then I remembered, I hadn't even responded like that to them in a while.

"Oh my God, Kenny, you answered me! Well, not exactly, but still!" He better not get fatheaded over his 'progress' now, because I did that by accident. "I'm calling Kyle!"

Why must people make a big deal out of such little things?

* * *

This fair is really crappy. The entire time I've been hiding behind Stan hoping nothing comes out of nowhere to kill me.

Now that I'm failing to push them away, I'm going to have to try not to die. It's a lot harder than I originally thought it would be. Twice, knives came out of nowhere and almost hit me. A ride even broke down and almost fell on top of me! Then some guy missed the target completely in one of the games and almost shot me! I'm really surprised after all that that I haven't died yet. All because I missed a day of death... At this point, I'm kind of expecting Death to chase me again.

"Dude, this whole time you've been hiding behind me looking terrified out of your mind. I know you almost died a few times, but you're still alive now and that says something, right?" I guess he's right... I came out from hiding behind him and stood still for a few minutes. When nothing came out to kill me, I sighed in relief.

"Kenny!" I sighed too soon. Another knife, I should have never let my guard down.

So much blood, the red faded to black...


	5. Blood Types

**Thanks My Dictator Level is Over 9000 for following and favoriting the story~ Also, thanks Subject077 for following~ 'Guest' and 'matthew', thanks for reviewing! Okay, this story definitely has gotten a lot more love since the last time I updated...**

**I would have posted this chapter earlier, but I realized that I never finished it. I spent last night finishing it, and starting the next chapter.**

**I apologize, the end of the chapter is a bit abrupt...**

**Anyway, enjoy! Please review too!**

_**[Chapter 5 - Blood Types]**_

* * *

I awoke in bed once again. Wait, this isn't my bed. I opened my eyes and found myself in a hospital room. A hospital room? That means... I didn't die.

"My baby's okay!" My parents are actually here? Oh, Kyle's in the room too... A sadly familiar question returned to my mind.

Where's Stan?

"Kenny, you're alive!" They must've thought I was going to die, maybe that's why Stan isn't here. I hope that's the reason anyway... "You lost a lot of blood and the doctors here are horrible so we all thought you were going to die..."

Yeah, I'm pretty surprised I'm alive too.

"Stan ended up donating blood. They got blood mixed up when they were checking his type so they thought it was compatible. At the last minute they found out it wasn't."

What? Stan tried to donate blood for me? Why am I not surprised that I almost died from it anyway?

"He's not here right now because the sight of all his blood made him throw up."

That's not surprising.

"Then he passed out because the doctors took too much."

That isn't either.

I can't believe Stan took keeping me alive so seriously though... Him donating blood? I never thought I'd hear of the day.

I wish I could thank him...

Suddenly, Cartman burst into the room.

"Guys, look at what I got my mom to get for Kenny since he's too poor!" Did he really have to add that? Whatever, it's Cartman, what else would you expect? He handed me a cell phone.

"Good thinking, Cartman! Now if Kenny doesn't want to talk to us, he can still text if he wants." Did Kyle just compliment Cartman? We both looked at him in awe. Then Cartman smirked.

"Jew, did you just compliment me?" Realization hit him and Cartman started laughing. I smiled when they started fighting as usual, at least something stayed the same over these years.

"Woah dude, Kenny's smiling." Suddenly all the attention was on me. Ah, I don't like when this happens! I turned away from them.

* * *

I was zoning out staring at the wall when Stan walked into the room.

"Dude, those doctors are fucking annoying. How do you even deal with this place?" He sighed and sat down next to me. "I can't believe they got the blood mixed up! You could've died... At least at the last minute they found a previous donation of your blood type." For a second, did I see fear in his eyes?


	6. I Forgot How

**Thanks for reviewing ben4kevin~ Also I shall thank you again and ilicsm, TechnoFool, and shycheyshy for following and favoriting!**

**I guess this chapter's a little longer than others, that's good, right? I tried to make it at least a little happy at the end for you guys.**

**Anyway, enjoy~ Don't forget to review!**

_**[Chapter 6 - I Forgot How]**_

* * *

I want to ask him why he takes my life so seriously, but I can't. Maybe it's better if I don't anyway.

Wait, I still could... I handed Stan my cell phone.

"A cell phone? Oh right, Kyle told me Cartman gave you one."

When aren't him and Kyle talking?

"It seems a bit suspicious for Cartman to suddenly be generous like that..."

He still called me poor.

"Why are you showing it to me though?"

I went to the contacts and showed it to him again.

"Do you want my number?"

I nodded.

"Oh, I guess that makes sense then..." He took my phone and added himself as a contact, then handed it back to me. "Kenny, if you're communicating with me like this now, why can't you just talk to me?"

I forgot how. I'm not used to human attention now...

I can't tell him that though. Well, I'm able to now, but I don't think I want to...

"How come you never answer me when I ask you something like that?" He looked a little hurt, and I felt bad.

Stan...

I went to the menu of the phone and went to text messages.

'I'm sorry.'

He took out his phone and checked the message.

"Why are you apologizing? I'm not mad..."

You looked hurt though...

"Kenny, it's okay, alright?" I still don't believe him... He sighed. "It's fine. Come on, let's let your mind focus on something else. We'll go to my house and play some video games, okay?"

I haven't played video games in a while...

He grabbed my wrist and started walking, indicating for me to follow. He's treating me as if I'm a pet, am I really a pet? Some sort of weak, dependent pet. Although, I don't think at the moment I mind too much.

Truthfully, I'm scared. I don't know what's going to happen. I can never truly die, actually, will I ever? Every time I do temporarily, I end up hurting other people. I realize now that staying away from them only hurts them more, but what can I do?

I don't mind having someone treat me like a pet, because it gives me someone to look up to. Now I have someone who can show me what to do.

Aren't I just hurting him though? He has his own life he should be attending to. Why does he focus on mine instead?

I stopped walking.

"Kenny, is something wrong?" He stopped and turned to me, still holding onto my wrist. "You're crying..."

I am?

I put my free hand on my cheek and felt tears. I hadn't even noticed... Now that I did, more began to come.

"I said it was alright, remember? It's going to be okay." He held me and I felt completely vulnerable. Broken down, I cried even more.

I don't want to hurt anyone anymore... Especially not Stan...

* * *

Stan handed me a controller, with his in his other hand.

"It's nice being able to play video games again with you." He smiled and put in the game.

I guess it is nice to be able to relax like this again...


	7. Engraved Into Memory

**Thanks for reviewing TechnoFool and ben4kevin! ActionGal07, so many reviews... I'm glad you all like the story~ Plushie Chinpokomon for everyone!**

**I just wrote this last night, after watching the 'Kenny Dies' episode again... I just had to.**

**Please review and enjoy!**

_**[Chapter 7 - Engraved Into Memory]**_

* * *

Is it that I'm jealous? No, I can't possibly... Kyle's his best friend! Why would I be jealous of him though? Well, he is always calling him and stuff... Wait, I'm not some chick! Why am I even jealous in the first place?!

Stan returned to the room and sat down next to me.

"Kenny, are you okay? You seem... deep in thought."

I silently nodded. He could even notice? That's kind of embarrassing... Wait, that jealousy could be because...

No, that would only make sense if I had developed feelings for him!

Have I?

"Are you listening?" Huh? He was talking to me? "You seem surprised, I guess that's a no." I took out my phone.

'I'm sorry.'

"Kenny..." He looked down. "Is that all you'll say to me? You don't need to apologize, okay?" He held me by my shoulders. "It's okay."

No, it isn't...

I avoided making eye contact with him, I just couldn't manage to. I can't apologize enough for it all. Not even just for simple things like that, I mean for more elaborate things too... For example, every time he ends up hurt because of one of my deaths.

I still can't forget that one time... It was the one that engraved itself the deepest in my memory, and probably had cost the most pain. Especially for him.

Stan...

My eyes welled up with tears. He seemed surprised at my action, but only for a second.

"It's okay, Kenny." That was all I had to hear as I let myself cry again.

He doesn't remember. Of course he wouldn't remember.

Stan...

I wonder how fragile I must seem to him. Well, at this point, I guess I kind of am... He always lets me cry into his jacket, knowing I could always break at any moment.

Why is he so kind to me if I only bring him pain? I suffer from it physically, while he does emotionally. Wouldn't it be best if I just stayed away?

Yet, he won't let me. I don't think I want to though... I like the feeling of having a shoulder to cry into... I've never been able to before.

Stan...

Thank you.


	8. Off Feelings

**Thanks ben4kevin, TechnoFool, and Solus0617~ Solus0617, I figured Kenny needed to be seen from a different angle, glad someone mentioned it. Ah, and I shall also thank you again for favoriting and following the story. Adding to that, thanks for favoriting ShadowMewMew!**

**This chapter seemed longer than this when I was typing... Don't they all though? At least I got something done for you guys...**

**The chapter name sort of gives away part of the chapter, but not exactly. Who said Kenny knows what those feelings actually mean? I mean, he's dated girls before, but has he ever felt 'love'?**

**Omk, I sound as if I'm putting questions in your head. [Well, I kind of am...] I'll just let you get to the story.**

**Enjoy and review!**

_**[Chapter 8 - Off Feelings]**_

* * *

"Dude, I know you normally don't eat a lot at home because of food budgets and everything, but you should at least try to eat a normal meal here..." I kept with my usual silence.

Why do I deserve a meal when my family can't have one too?

"If it's about your family, I could always ask my mom to leave the leftovers for them."

I'm still not exactly sure...

"Kenny, I'm just trying to get you to eat normally." He leaned closer to me and I felt uncomfortable.

Ah, our faces are too close...

I pulled the strings on my hoodie to hide my face more.

Out of the many questions in my head, I was able to understand one thing, my feelings toward Stan are off. I wouldn't exactly call it 'developing feelings' for him, or maybe a normal person would. I think it might just be from so little human interaction for too long, and now that someone's actually showing an interest in me...

I don't know, but I can't help but blush from embarrassment and such. If he saw, I'd be even more embarrassed.

"Kenny, why're you hiding your face like that?"

Stan, I can't answer you...

"Kenny?" He stared at me for a little while and ended up giving up. "Another thing you can't tell me, huh?"

'I'm sorry.'

He didn't even bother to check his phone. I'm pretty sure he already knows what it says...

Stan...

I hugged him, to both of our surprise. I just couldn't stand the sad look in his eyes. I didn't want to make him upset again...

"K-Kenny...?"

Okay, now that I've done this, I don't know what else to do...

"For you to be doing this yet not answering me..." Is he starting to figure it out? I let go of him. "Something is wrong." He looked at my face. "Why won't you at least text me about it though?"

I looked down.

"Kenny, what's wrong?"

I don't know how to tell you...

"Kenny?!"

I don't know...

My eyes teared up and I hugged him again.

"Kenny... Can you... not talk?" He figured it out... "Why though? What's stopping you?"

Stan, shouldn't you know by now that I can't answer you?

"Okay, at this point, I seem to be only talking to myself out loud..." I felt his eyes look down on me again, I still hadn't let go. "I guess that enough for today then, I'm pretty sure this drama must exhaust you. Why don't we eat now?"

I looked up at him and nodded.


	9. Being Selfish

**Thanks for reviewing ben4kevin and TechnoFool! Additional 'thank you's to The Starkiller for following. SouthParkRules642 is also an 'official puppet' now, for favoriting/following me and the story. [That title doesn't mean much other than getting some credit as a fan. Although, I love my puppets all the same!]**

**Ah, so I'm guessing you're wondering about the extremely early update? Well, I got writer's block on my a few of the other stories at the moment. Also, I'm supposed to be posting a new story soon, a Crycest one, and since I haven't come up with a title yet, I figured I'd post this in the meantime.**

**Sadly, it's a short chapter, but depressing all the while.**

**Enjoy the small gift, and please leave a review~**

_**[Chapter 9 - Being Selfish]**_

* * *

Summer's almost over, and that means I'll be seeing Stan less. That also means I'll have to deal with everyone at school. Stan won't have a reason to be with me outside of school, maybe to hang out every so often, but it won't be everyday, from night to day anymore.

He has his own life to go back to...

I'll be alone again with my thoughts... What would happen when I get stuck with them again?

The doorbell rang, letting me escape from them.

"That's Kyle, he said he had to tell me something. I figured I hadn't seen him in a while, so he could come over to tell me. He said it's private though, so can you stay in here for a bit?"

I nodded.

"Thanks, I'll be back." With that, I was left alone in Stan's room.

Ah wait, he forgot his jacket! If he's going outside to let Kyle in, then...

I left the room with his jacket in my hands, stopping when I made it halfway down the hallway. They were already inside, and I can hear them in the living room.

"What did you need to tell me, Kyle?"

"Well, Stan... I..." Kyle was having difficulty telling him whatever it was. "I wanted to say..." Wait, I remember when some girls used to act that way around me... "I-I've liked you for a long time, okay? I-I just didn't know how to..." I couldn't interpret the rest of his words, I was already quickly making my way back to Stan's room.

'I'm sorry.'

I shouldn't have been listening to them...

'I'm sorry.'

Why do I feel jealous though...?

'I'm sorry.'

Stan's not going to show me any attention anymore now...

'I'm sorry.'

Why do I have to be selfish?

'I'm sorry, Stan.'

I know one way he'll have to continue to stay with me...


	10. Sending A Message

**Thanks EddieMcCormick and wangwww0! Both of you followed and reviewed, wew. Ah, and a little extra thanks to EddieMcCormick for also favoriting.**

**Amazingly, this is something from Stan's point of view! It only took so many chapters, right?**

**Why do I feel as if this will be my next overly-updated fanfic now that _Just Someone's Toy_ is over?**

**Nothing much to say about this chapter... other than the random details towards the end seem so out of place.**

**Enjoy the chapter if you can make it through the beginning. Don't forget to review!**

_**[Chapter 10 - Sending A Message]**_

* * *

How do I respond to that? No one's confessed to me before. Oh god, I think I'm going to...

I hear footsteps.

Was Kenny listening?

My cell suddenly went off making the usual text noise four times, with a delayed fifth.

They were all from Kenny.

I checked them, and sure enough, they were all the same. Other than the last one, it had my name included.

'I'm sorry, Stan.'

He never includes my name. Something's very wrong.

I ran upstairs, opening the door to a sight I was hoping to never see again. He had managed to wrap my computer's wire around his neck, and choke himself.

He really can kill himself with anything, huh?

He's just lying there, eyes wide open, he was smiling faintly.

"They killed Kenny..." 'They' being his thoughts I guess. The words just seemed so familiar, they slipped off my tongue unconsciously.

"Bastards..." I hadn't even noticed Kyle walk into the room, I was too... distracted.

"H-he was getting better... W-why...?"

"Stan..."

"Why couldn't I figure out what was wrong?!"

"It's not your fault."

"Yes it is, I was with him this whole time, yet I didn't notice anything. I couldn't help..."

"You did help though. That was longest living streak he's had in months."

"Then why did he...?" My words trailed off as I realized. He had done this after listening to us, that means he heard Kyle confess.

Does that also mean he thought I'd leave him alone again?

"Kenny..." He just didn't want to be alone. Was the only way he could send me that message through suicide? "I'm sorry..." Kyle placed his hand on my shoulder, probably as an attempt to comfort me.

"He'll be back tomorrow. Then you could try asking him about it, okay?"

"I'll try..." The truth was, I already knew. "Kyle, can you leave for a little?" Understanding, he nodded and left me with Kenny.

* * *

I've been sitting on this floor for hours. Yet this entire time, all I could think about was Kenny. I know he just died and everything, but I still feel like something was wrong about the way I was thinking.

I looked back over at his limp body. His light blue eyes were glazed over, with this look of absence as they gazed at the doorway. His skin did seem a bit paler, but not by much, he hasn't been dead for too long after all. He looked as if he'd start moving again at any second. It was almost as if he'd just come over to me saying 'sorry' over and over again. I'd only wish for him to say something, _anything_ other than that.

Yet, my wish would never be granted. I don't think I'd ever at least get to hear him actually say 'sorry'.

I moved back over to the body, not wanting to disturb it, but with no other choice. I managed to unwrap the wires, moving them away from him. Then I closed his eyes, so he'd at least seem more at peace. He actually looked kind of cute.

Oh God, did I just call a dead body cute?!

Wait, but it's not just any body, it's still Kenny...

I still think I'm going insane for thinking about that though. Especially at a time like this.

Hey, now that I think about it, how exactly does he come back to life anyway?


	11. Isolating Myself

**Thanks for reviewing ben4kevin and The Starkiller! I believe hugging is the closest they'll get to anything at the moment, I don't want to rush anything you know. It's still closer than before!**

**It's so short, I'm sorry. It just had to end because of next chapter. ****Anyway, I should have posted this yesterday, but I was too exhausted. On that note, I'm sorry if this chapter seems off, I was tired, to the point where I was becoming delirious.**

**Does anyone else see Stan as basically Kenny's knight in shining armor? I realized that last night, it's so adorable~**

**Right, right, so enjoy the chapter. Please review too~**

_**[Chapter 11 - Isolating Myself]**_

* * *

Stan, I'm so sorry...

I remained in my bed, curled up in a ball.

My selfishness must have caused you so much pain... You're never going to forgive me... You wouldn't want to waste your time with me knowing you can't help anyway... Maybe... it's best I stay away from you now.

Why did I have to start getting attached? I should just let you go and be happy with Kyle...

* * *

I woke up from my nap because of the banging at my door.

"Kenny, please open the door... I fell asleep waiting for you to come back and when I woke up your body was gone. How come you never came...? Why did you lock yourself in there...?" I sat there, staring at the door. Should I open it...? "I'm worried, please..."

How could you forgive me so easily?

"I promise... not to leave you. You won't be alone anymore, okay? Locking yourself in there, you're isolating yourself. It's not going to help at all..."

How did he know...?

I opened the door.

"Kenny..." He hugged me immediately afterwards, which took me by surprise. It caused me to blush automatically.

My eyes teared up once again. Dammit, why do I keep on crying...?

Releasing me, he took my wrist.

"Come on, you should eat. We'll go to my house so you can actually get a decent amount of food, okay?" I nodded, having nothing to say. Was he really that worried about me? I used to die all the time anyway, but out of the few times he's remembered recently, he reacted a lot differently this time.

We made our way downstairs, walking past my parents who either didn't notice us or didn't care. That reminds me... where are Kevin and Karen? I stopped walking, catching Stan's attention which resulted in him stopping too.

"Hm? What's wrong?" I looked over to my parents, they were now arguing again. "Is it about your family again?" I nodded. "I heard your mom say something about Karen being over a friend's house today, so she's okay, alright?" I looked back to him.

I wish there was a way I could thank him, but I can't do anything... I guess I'll just resort to the only thing I could think of...

I hugged him, and he smiled. At least he seems happy when I do this.


	12. Without Me

**Thanks for reviewing ben4kevin, The Starkiller, EddieMcCormick, and TechnoFool~ I shall also thank aliceyuky for favoriting and following!**

**I was up watching a livestream all night [it should be pretty obvious who's], and figured I'd do some writing for my puppets while listening. On that note, I'm extremely exhausted right now. Apparently, I come up with the best ideas while I am.**

**Next chapter will be their first day in school for the new year! That shall be interesting~ I might start writing that now, I'm excited for it.**

**Oh right, so we're back to Stan's point of view. His thoughts seem to trail off every once in a while, it's quite amusing.**

**Enjoy the chapter! Please leave a review too~ It's much appreciated.**

_**[Chapter 12 - Without Me]**_

* * *

We stood at the doorstep of my house now. There was one thing that came to my mind, but I really didn't want to think about it. If I bring it up, it might upset Kenny anyway... Well, the subject has to be looked upon sooner or later...

"Kenny... You know school starts soon, right?" He looked up at me and nodded. "You know that also means..." He grabbed my hand before I could even finish my sentence. I guess he already knows...

When school starts, it's not like we're both going to have the same schedules. He's going to have to deal with people alone, without me. Last year, we were sophomores, so everyone was focused on their own social lives and everything, so no one would bother him at all. This year we're going to be juniors so all the teachers are going to bother us about college and things like that. Then all the upperclassmen dances and such will be going on and all the girls will probably start bothering him again...

I wonder... would he still act the same way he used to towards girls? Wait, is he even into girls still?

Oh God, why am I even wondering this?!

"Let's go inside..." We walked into my house, to find my mom cleaning up the living room.

"Oh Stanley, you're back home already? Ah, and you've brought your little friend with you, I was wondering why you left so suddenly..." She still treats me as if I'm a child... Seeming to notice something, she smiled. "I'll go into the kitchen and start making dinner." With that, she left.

At that moment I realized Kenny and I were still holding hands. I immediately let go when noticing, confusing Kenny. I don't believe he noticed at all, and my sudden movements must have surprised him.

"Why don't we go into my room?" Still looking somewhat confused, he nodded.

* * *

My mom had brought dinner up for us earlier. Since my dad was off doing something stupid again and my sister was out, she thought it would be okay if we just ate up here.

Now we're just sitting on my bed, Kenny's been staring at the ceiling for a while with his usual silence. I wonder what he's thinking about...

"It'll be okay, alright?" He looked over to me, with this sad look in his eyes. "Kenny..." I hugged him to try and cheer him up, knowing it probably wouldn't do much.

We only have about a week left to relax like this after all. We both know that. I wonder how things will be once we go back to school...


	13. A Pleasant Day

**Thanks ben4kevin, The Starkiller, and TechnoFool for reviewing! I'm sorry to say, ben4kevin, that the title of this chapter is Kenny being sarcastic. The Starkiller, I'm glad you love the story~ Also, TechnoFool, your wish was granted, this one is longer, but somewhat choppy.**

**We're back to Kenny's point of view! This chapter... will probably put a lot more questions in your head.**

**Speaking of having a few screws loose [mentioned later in the chapter], I believe from what I read about it, Kenny has Selected Mutism. That means Kenny and one of my Sympathyloids, Isao Katashi, share the same mental illness!**

**I doubt anyone gets what I just said.**

**Anyway, let your mind almost explode from the contents of this chapter. Please leave a review of what you think~**

_**[Chapter 13 - A Pleasant Day]**_

* * *

All of us stood at our bus stop, the same one we've had for years. Kyle seemed to be avoiding me and Stan, choosing to fight with Cartman rather than actually talk to us. Did I miss something while I was gone that day? I know he confessed, but what happened afterwards? Well, from how they're acting, it didn't end well.

The bus pulled up in front of us, and Stan grabbed my wrist.

"You can sit with me, okay?" Kyle would normally sit next to him every year, they really are avoiding each other...

Is it my fault?

In my daze, I followed Stan onto the bus, taking a seat next to him. Craig looked over at us, giving me this questioning look. When Stan noticed, Craig gave him the finger.

"Any idea what that was about?" Stan kept his voice low, so he couldn't hear. I shrugged in response, although I had a feeling...

* * *

The rest of the bus ride was somewhat peaceful, better than I expected. Now we were at the actual school, and first period starts soon. I have English, and Stan has Algebra II, they're in completely different sections of the school, so once the period ends, we won't be able to see each other during the little break we get to go to our next class...

"Don't worry, it's only the first day. I'm sure all they're going to be doing is giving an introduction of what we're doing for the year." He smiled to me, managing to make me feel a little bit better, and left me at my classroom.

* * *

Gym started and I sighed in relief. This was one of the few classes I had with Stan, so I guess I was going to be okay.

During the period we were told which gym teacher we had, our 'squads', so on. Most of the period was spent sitting on the bleachers, and almost everyone was talking. Stan and I were trying to enjoy the relaxing time too, but it just didn't seem right.

* * *

I was on my way to the lunch room when Craig stopped me.

"I thought you were avoiding them?"

Well, I was, but...

"You can't just stay silent and stay with them, you have to choose one of the other because if you stay how you are currently, you'll only hurt them more than the other options would." Am I hurting Stan by being this way? I silently nodded in agreement and walked away.

Craig was right about all of this from the start. What do I do at this point though?

I walked into the boy's bathroom and locked myself in one of the stalls. It's not like I was going to eat lunch today anyway...

* * *

In Global History, Stan sat next to me. He was going to ask me something, but the bell rang and the teacher entered the room.

I have a feeling it was going to be about my absence in lunch.

* * *

"You're continuing with your silent act this year too?" He smirked and stepped closer to me. "I thought that was only a phase you were having for attention." He grabbed me by my parka. "Maybe you just have a screw or two loose up there? Allow me to fix that for you."

His fist collided with my stomach. I guess it's good I didn't eat lunch.

* * *

I managed to make it to the front of the school. This is where I agreed with Stan to meet at after school, hopefully I didn't take too long...

"Kenny, you're late. Did something happen?" I can't tell him, I was lucky enough for him to not notice these things last year... I can't let that go to waste. I shook my head, trying to tell him nothing happened. "What about during lunch then? Where were you?" I looked straight at him.

Stan, we both know I can't answer that question at all. Even if I did have a good reason, I wouldn't be able to tell you.

"Right, that's not a yes or no question. I forgot you can't answer those..." He sighed. "Well, let's go over my house then. Did you get homework today too?" I nodded. "First day and there's already homework, just shows how nice this year's teachers are..."

Yes, today truly was a pleasant day, wasn't it?

I sighed.


	14. A Real Knight

**Thank you for reviewing ben4kevin and The Starkiller~**

**Okay, this chapter is long, extremely long. I had to end it somewhere or else it would be going on and on, so sorry if the end seems a bit abrupt.**

**Unsurprisingly, this fanfic has now become mental disorder related. I shall thank wikipedia for helping me since I forgot some of the details of 'Selective Mutism'. Everything mentioned about MPD is from my memory, so sorry if some stuff seems incorrect.**

**Stan's point of view, and he's definitely had a long day, it makes me feel bad for ending it where I did. At least Kenny will take over next chapter, so I won't confuse you with Stan's confusion.**

**Ah right, I forgot to thank Shiori last chapter for helping me with my confusion on who's point of view this chapter, and the last one should be in.**

**Now my puppets, be prepared. I have no idea what you'll even think of this really long chapter. On that note, please leave a review so I will.**

_**[Chapter 14 - A Real Knight]**_

* * *

It's been a few days in school now, and Kenny's been acting the same way everyday. Now, we're all standing at the bus stop again. Kyle's still avoiding me after that little argument we had over the phone that night. He seems to be using Cartman as a way to keep away from me. I won't complain, but I still miss at least being able to talk to him.

I'm starting to worry about Kenny now. Once again, he's standing next to me, just staring at the ground. He looks like he's thinking way too hard though, as if he's currently having an inner battle with himself.

"S-St-Stan..."

_Oh my God_.

_He just said my name_.

We were all staring at him, too shocked to do anything else.

"St-Stan..." He started crying, and I hugged him not knowing what else to do.

He just said my name.

I feel so overjoyed right now, I don't know what to do. I felt the tears of happiness start to well up in my eyes. Cartman and Kyle continued to gape at us, still trying to process what just happened.

The bus pulled up, and I didn't care at all that the people could see us.

He just said my name.

That was all that mattered.

"Get your asses on the bus or I'm leaving you children here!" Dammit, Mrs. Crabtree, why do you have to ruin everything?!

I smiled to Kenny and took his hand, leading him into the bus. We sat down together, and that was when I noticed Kenny wasn't crying of joy.

No, there was something else...

How had I not noticed before? I guess I was too wrapped up in the fact that he actually talked...

* * *

I dropped him off at his first period class, apologizing for not being able to do anything else at the moment. He kept shaking his head and muttering my name.

I wish I could understand...

"I'm sorry Kenny... I'll see you during gym, okay?" With that, I had to leave him, the bell already rang...

* * *

During gym, Kenny stood next to me the entire time. He seemed to be trying to avoid almost everyone else.

Something's going on, and I can't do anything about it. He even went to the extent of actually speaking, to try and tell me something.

I just still don't know what that something is.

* * *

Kenny showed up at lunch today. I tried to get him to eat, but he did the same thing as this morning. He just shook his head and muttered my name. No matter how hard I tried, he just kept refusing.

* * *

We were actually working in Psychology today.

I didn't tell Kenny, but I made a last minute change of schedule to switch to this class. I figured I might be able to understand Kenny more if I could figure out what he was thinking. All I switched it for was Woodshop, and I'm pretty sure that won't help me in the future anyway.

I was going ahead in the textbook while the teacher continued on about Multiple Personality Disorder.

"Most of the time, the victim doesn't even know they have it. They remain unaware of the other personas that have developed in their minds."

Hm? What's this? 'Selective Mutism'?

"There is always that one personality that knows almost everything about what's going on, so technically, the person does know deep inside their mind."

'Some symptoms include difficulty maintaining eye contact, tendency to worry more, difficulty of expressing feelings, and a dislike of changes.'

Yeah, that sounds like him... How he was at first anyway, some of these he's seemed to get better at...

"It is also hard to actually diagnose someone with the disorder, since it can be mistaken for many others."

'Positive symptoms include a love for art and music, sensitivity to others' thoughts and feelings, a strong sense of right and wrong, and above average perception.'

Hm, I wonder if this is true about Kenny?

"MPD is normally developed to protect the original personality from the outside world. To protect itself, and to stay away from others."

Maybe Kenny had the same reasoning when he first went silent...

* * *

Global History was dragging on today. Even if the teacher is lively, he's still not doing as well as he normally does to actually make the subject interesting.

I looked over at Kenny, he seemed to be sketching something in his notebook. It was us, as what I believe are called chibi.

Wow, I didn't know Kenny could draw in the first place.

Focusing more on what we were actually doing in the picture, I could tell I was wearing a knight outfit, and he was wearing a prince-like one.

A knight and a prince? As if we're...

No, that can't be it. I think I get what he really means... I've been looking out for him so much recently that he feels like one of those useless princesses in the video games. That would make more sense.

Kenny noticed I was looking at his picture, and immediately put his arm over it to hide it, while looking away from me. I waited for when the teacher wasn't looking our way, and whispered to him.

"Don't worry, I think it's cool." This caused him to look back at me, and I could see this little gleam in his eyes.

At least part of our day was peaceful.

* * *

Kenny's late again. Is his last class really so far away from here?

Or could it possibly be... something's going on?

I immediately ran back into the building after the thought. What class did he have now? I think it was Study Hall...

I hurried to where the classroom was, to find it empty.

That's right, I think he had a lab today. Dammit, that's upstairs, and I just got here. I sighed, and made my way up to the classroom.

* * *

He's not here either, where could he be?

"Stan...?" I turned around to find Kenny behind me. How had I not noticed him around here before?!

"Kenny, we're going to my house, okay?" We needed to leave the school before I lost sight of him. If something really does go on after school, I have to try and protect him from it.

Like a real knight should.

"Stan...?" He seemed confused about the urgency in my voice.

"Come on, we have to go." I went to grab his arm, but soon after he winced and pulled it away.

"Kenny...?"


	15. Acting Differently

**Thank you for reviewing once again ben4kevin and The Starkiller!**

**To make up for the chapter being somewhat sort, I'll provide you with a little explanation for things that might be confusing you. Here we go!**

**About the 'Selective Mutism', it only happens in certain situations. During these situations, the person is unable to speak, even if they want to. This whole thing with the separation and deaths is what counts as Kenny's 'situation'. With it all going on, he thought maybe the mutism was a good thing, and decided not to even bother trying to speak. Once he wanted to again, he realized he couldn't. Last chapter, he was able to finally partially overcome it.**

**Now, as for Kenny's view on yaoi, he was way too focused on boobs and such when younger, that he never really thought about being with a guy. Now that he's going through all of this, he doesn't understand any feelings that are like that for Stan, and just brushes them aside. Obviously at the moment he can't focus on things like love, sadly. On that note, he doesn't notice any of the hints that Stan may like him in that way. Basically, he's completely oblivious when it comes to boyxboy love.**

**Did that make up for it? Hopefully that helped with making some things make sense.**

**Now I shall let you pass onto the actual story! Leave a review on whatever you think of the chapter, maybe even who you think is hurting Kenny.**

_**[Chapter 15 - Acting Differently]**_

* * *

"Kenny..." No... He's going to question me now...

"Stan..." I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, I just couldn't... What Craig said had gotten to me, I had to do one or the other. I didn't know what I'd do without you again, so that left talking as the only option.

I wanted your name to be my first word.

That practice at home was worth it, because I was finally able to fully say it when I was with you. You were so happy... but I still felt something was wrong.

I think it was guilt for not telling you about this.

However, now that you're so close to knowing... I don't know what to do. Maybe it would've been better if I told you earlier instead of you finding out like this.

"Did... someone hurt you, Kenny?"

"Stan..."

"Please don't avoid the question." I stood, and soon nodded. "Kenny..." He looked like he wanted to comfort me, but was too afraid to touch me. I guess he didn't want to chance hurting me...

"Stan..." He took my hand and started walking.

"This doesn't hurt, right? We're going to my house, and you're going to tell me who did this. Then tomorrow I'm kicking their ass." I had a feeling that's how he'd respond...

"Stan..." I tried to sound unsure, but it was hard with only one word to say...

"Don't try and stop me, my mind's made up. Now let's get the hell out of here."

* * *

He took my parka off of me and insisted on getting ice for my bruises. I still don't see how ice helps, but I agreed anyway, to make him feel better.

I flinched from the sudden cold feeling, but Stan was holding it gently, so it didn't hurt too much...

"There's a lot of them..." He seemed upset, and I felt bad. Although, he was expected to find out eventually...

He seems to be avoiding my gaze and only looking at the bruises. Did I do something wrong?

"Stan...?"

"What is it?" He still wasn't looking at my face. I sighed, I don't think there's a way to figure out why he's acting like this at the moment.

The thought that Stan was looking all across my abdomen for bruises suddenly made me feel really uncomfortable... Just being shirtless in front of him in general... At least in gym class I'd be able to sneak away to the stalls and change without him seeing, or noticing my bruises.

In response to this thought, I had wrapped my arms around myself.

"Kenny? What's wrong? I have to help you with your bruises and I can't while you're blocking me..." He's still not looking at my face. Why won't he?

"Stan..." Why won't he just look at me?

As if cornered and with no other option, he finally looked at me, and I could see the blush across his face.

Why was he trying to hide that? Wait, why is he even blushing? It certainly doesn't match the expression he has...

"Kenny, you're acting different now..."

You are too!

"Please tell me what's wrong..."

I can't Stan, I can't. I would if I could...

He took my hand in his and looked straight at me.

"It'll be okay, I promise. You actually talked today, do you know how big that is? There's still a lot of things to get past, but at least you've started."

"Stan..." I would've never been able to do it without you.


	16. So Dead

**I'm really mad at Gmail right now.**

**FanFiction too, although that one was my fault.**

**I just typed this whole author's note, and then accidentally clicked refresh. I'm such a failure...**

**Anyway, back to why I'm mad at Gmail. They were sending all my emails from FanFiction to spam! I thought my last chapter sucked and no one bothered to review or something, but it wasn't that! Now I've missed some previous reviews and might have never thanked some people... I'm sorry, it's all sorted out now though.**

**Now for the 'thank you's, I really hope everyone is here this time. Thanks 'random', you gave me so many reviews. They were awesome, you are awesome. Ah, and ben4kevin, you will probably hate Craig even more in the future. Yup, he's going to show up soon, possibly even next chapter. Now, TechnoFool, I wrote this chapter in one night after noticing people really did review! I hope you are satisfied with its contents. KageNekoReborn, first off, I feel as if that's a KHR reference, is it? Anyway, thanks for favoriting and following! By the way, I do hope to do some KHR fanfics in the future if you are interested in that.**

**Now, finally, back to the story! It's Stan's point of view this time. Please review, and enjoy. I promise I'll actually be able to see them this time!**

_**[Chapter 16 - So Dead]**_

* * *

I refused to let Kenny go back home tonight. I just couldn't let him leave my sight... that seems a bit selfish, doesn't it? Although, I only needed the assurance that he would be okay. That would be more like looking out for him, right? Even now, while he lays next to me, I just want to wrap my arms around him to let him feel safe...

Dammit, I really do have a crush on him...

What am I going to do? It's starting to prevent me from doing things for him that I should. I mean, even before, I was trying to help him with his bruises, yet I couldn't stop myself from blushing when I saw him shirtless. I didn't want him to see, but I ended up having to look at him anyway. He saw my blush, yet seemed confused by it, does that mean he hasn't noticed?

Why does that make me somewhat sad? I guess I kind of want him to notice...

A sigh escaped my lips.

I doubt he'd feel the same though... He was always really into girls before; he wouldn't even think about being with me.

"Stan...?"

"Yes, Kenny?" Ah, I keep forgetting he can't answer me like that...

Before I could ask a better suited question, he moved closer to me and cuddled up to me. Lucky for me, I was facing the other way and he couldn't see me blushing.

Is he doing this because he's possibly... worried about me? When I had told him he was acting differently before, he had given me a look as if I was too. Was I?

"Stan..." His voice was a whisper, it sounded as if he was exhausted. He must be falling asleep.

That means I'd be stuck with him cuddled up to me all night.

Sure, there have been times where Kyle would cuddle up to me in his sleep during one of our sleepovers in the past, but this was different. I feel comfortable, but not at the same time. I wonder how Kyle felt waking up like that?

Speaking of Kyle... I can't believe he's still mad at me for our argument. Well, actually, I did yell at him about how he didn't care about Kenny enough. When he had died... Kyle just took it so lightly and simply said he'd be back tomorrow. Yet, it wasn't the fact he'd be gone for the night that had bothered me, it was the fact that he had _killed himself_. How had that not bothered him the slightest?

Okay, okay, I need to stop thinking about it, it's only going to piss me off. Maybe I should just go to sleep already.

* * *

School today was like every other day, same basic thing as usual. I guess Kyle and Cartman don't want to sit with me and Kenny anymore, because they've moved to Butters's table. Now we're just a table of two.

Not that I'm bothered by that.

"Stan! Stan!" Hm? Is that Bebe? I turned around and she hurried over to me.

"What is it, Bebe?"

"Do you, like, have a crush on Kenny or something?"

W-what? Is it that noticeable?!

I tried to look completely innocent and placed my hand on the back of my head.

"Why do you ask such a thing?" Her eyes glistened as if I just triggered something in her mind. Oh no, is that a group of her friends over there?

"You totally do! You would've said no otherwise~" What have I done? Well, once Bebe gets involved in things, there's no way to keep her out of it.

"Okay, fine, I do, but Bebe, this has to be kept a secret. You can't tell anyone! Got that?" She excitedly nodded.

"Of course! I just wanted to know to see if that meant Wendy was going to be single or not."

Wait, what?

"I have to be a good friend and help her with her relationship problems!"

Oh, okay.

"I'll see you later, Stan!"

"Bye..." With that, she scurried off to her group of friends that within seconds burst into giggles.

She's never going to keep it a secret.

I'm... I'm so dead.


	17. Pry It Away

**Thank you for reviewing ben4kevin, KageNekoReborn, Starlight-blood-flower, ****and TechnoFool [I apologize once again for you not being mentioned previously]!**

**Have any of you heard of the South Park game that's going to come out? Kenny's the princess and Stan's a knight! Do you know how happy I was when I saw that? It was amazing! Okay, back to story-related things.**

**Butters actually has lines! Amazing, right? I'm planning for next chapter to be in Kenny's view, and Craig will probably show up again, so I'm warning you guys.**

**I don't want to give away anything in the chapter, so I'll keep this author's note short.**

**Enjoy the chapter, and please review!**

_**[Chapter 17 - Pry It Away]**_

* * *

Everyone's been looking at us today... Dammit, what did Bebe do? This is definitely a different reaction than when rumors about a crush are normally spread. Maybe it's because gays aren't that easily excepted here? Well, apparently the gay and bi fall under the same category.

It's lunchtime and Kenny's noticed the looks too by now. The only difference is he seems extremely confused by them.

Ah, he's so cute during the few times where he seems completely innocent.

"Well, heya fellas." Butters? Why would he even bother to walk over to our nearly empty table? "I heard you guys were a couple! Well, that's amazing! I'm really happy for-"

"H-hold on a second, Butters. _What_ did you just say?"

"I was just congratulating you guys on getting together, that's all." Oh God, this is even worse than the truth...

"Where did you hear that from?"

"Well, I was told by Red, who heard it from-"

"Okay, you don't have to list all of them." As I expected, it was just a typical game of telephone.

Maybe this isn't bad as it being about a crush? After all, I could always just say someone made it up and Kenny wouldn't suspect me of anything... I don't know if I can lie to him though, maybe he'll assume it himself?

I glanced over at Kenny, I can't really read his expression...

"Stan...?"

"Woah, since when was Kenny talking?!" That's right, Butters still knows nothing about the whole thing.

"Right now, that's the only thing he can say."

"Wow guys, isn't that _sweet_?" Oh God, not Cartman now too. He's probably going to act like a dick just because he's on Kyle's side...

"We're not a couple, okay?"

"You don't have to deny it when you obviously want it so badly." Of course Kyle would be next to show, of course. Well, if he wants to play it that way...

"Someone sounds jealous." He immediately stiffened; I guess I hit a weak point.

"Fuck you."

"I'm sure you'd love to." By now, almost everyone was looking at us. It's not really much of a difference since many of them were already looking at me and Kenny before.

Kenny himself was looking at me worriedly. I think he's one of the few people that know the full meaning behind my words. I don't want to say things like this in front of him of all people...

I'm sorry, Kenny, but there's no way to avoid this... Hopefully you understand.

"B-bastard!" Next thing I knew, Kyle's fist was colliding with my face. He must have gotten the balls to react when I wasn't paying attention. Kenny immediately hurried over to me.

"Stan..." Dammit, I really do feel bad about worrying him...

"Don't worry, Kenny. I'm fine." I smiled to him. "The bastard's pretty weak anyway." I heard Kyle's footsteps and I didn't even think of the fact that he could go after Kenny.

"Kenny!" He harshly fell back into the wall. The flag which was hanging loosely on the wall fell and pierced right through him. We all stood in shock.

"I-I killed Kenny..." I didn't care about the sound of terror within Kyle's voice; I was already consumed by rage.

"You bastard!" My fist collided with his face.

* * *

They ended school early, and sent everyone home. However, I refused to leave his body. It didn't matter who came to move me, I had to wait for him to come back. That was all that mattered.

It's not like any of them will remember this tomorrow, only me, Cartman, and that bastard.

Eventually, both our parents showed up after hearing the news about Kenny and the current situation.

They'll have to hold me down and pry his dead body out of my hands before I go anywhere.


	18. Asking For Permission

**Thank you ben4kevin, Starlight-blood-flower, The Starkiller, TechnoFool, anglei, and KageNekoReborn for reviewing! I believe I just made everyone dislike Kyle... Ah, and ScarecrowKakashi, you followed the story right before I was about to update this, just in time to be mentioned!**

**Anyway, I've had this chapter done, but written on paper. It took me a little bit to actual post it because I had to type up the whole thing. Writing on paper is also the reason why the chapter's are a bit shorter than usual, sorry.**

**This chapter narrows down who could be beating up Kenny! It would be nice to leave a part of your review saying who you think it is~ Ah, so enjoy the chapter. By the way, does Craig seem suspicious in this? I was rereading it and couldn't tell...**

_**[Chapter 18 - Asking For Permission]**_

* * *

I showed up at Stan's house early to check up on him. When I walked into his room, I did not expect to find him on the floor out cold.

Do I dare ask what happened while I was gone?

I knelt down next to him, trying to decide how I should wake him up. Unless, he needs the sleep? No, I must wake him, I don't want him getting into trouble if he's late...

I was so lost in thought, I hadn't noticed he had already awoken until he glomped me.

"Kenny, I'm so sorry for worrying you... I should have thought of a better way to handle the situation... Then you would've never..." I smiled and hugged back to keep him from going further. I hope he takes that as me forgiving him. Maybe I can think of a good word to try and speak to clarify?

"Stan... Th-th-tha..." Nope, too hard. I sighed.

"You don't have to rush yourself into talking yet. Take your time, okay?" I nodded. "By the way, were you trying to say 'thanks'?" I nodded again. "Ah, I see. Why 'thanks' though? Wait, I think I'm more of talking to myself now..." He laughed nervously, and I have to admit I liked it.

Then I remembered the time and pointed to the clock in his room. He looked over and almost immediately jumped up after seeing.

"Shit! Why didn't you show me sooner?!" With that, he started running around the room getting ready. I smiled to myself when he almost tripped over his own backpack in his rush.

* * *

I have a bad feeling about today and I don't know why. Maybe it's because he didn't beat me up yesterday? Did that possibly have something to do with that rumor?

Wait, could he have been the one that started that rumor?!

"Kenny, pay attention! You're never going to have the quadratic equation memorized otherwise!"

God dammit.

I nodded.

* * *

Craig stopped me on my way to lunch again today. He looked like he was trying hard to not flip me off or something.

"Hey Kenny, you can always move to our table if you don't want to sit at that table of loners anymore." I looked at him, did he just call me and Stan loners? "That's what everyone's been calling it lately, dude. There's not really anyone to back you up on it either because you two kind of are loners now that your group has split up." Wait, was he just offering something to me? Who ever thought of the day where he'd actually do that for anyone?

"Stan...?" Obviously, I couldn't just accept the offer alone. I mean, it would be nice sitting with three of my old friends, but he's there too. Also, I can't just leave Stan alone!

He sighed.

"Yeah, Stan can come too, as long as he doesn't act like a dick." Stan acting like a dick? That would never happen! If anyone acts like a dick to people, it would be...

Wait, friend, that probably means I shouldn't even be thinking these things.

"So will you be joining our group?"

"Stan..."

"You're going to ask for his permission first, aren't you?" I nodded.

* * *

I stood next to Stan, giving him the puppy eyes look to convince him to say yes. From prior events, I've already learned it's almost impossible for him to say no to them.

"God dammit, Kenny. Why do you have to be friends with those guys?"

"Stan~" My whining made him stay quiet. Wendy's smarter than I thought, copying what she used to do, he still hasn't said no to me yet.

"Fine." He was looking away from me, but I could still see blush on his face.

Did I do that?

"Stan... Than-thanks." I was finally able to say it and I smiled to him afterwards. He stood there surprised, even Craig seemed surprised at the new word. Craig was the one to recover first, rolling his eyes.

"Are we done with all the lovey-dovey crap yet?" Stan sighed.

"Kenny, what have you made me agree to?"


	19. Bottom of Things

**Thank you for reviewing ben4kevin, TechnoFool, Starlight-blood-flower, and The Starkiller! TechnoFool, thank you for the correction. Looking back, I actually had that written down but then typed it incorrectly... The Starkiller, I'm glad he didn't seem suspicious! You can tell in this chapter he's just trying to be a good friend to Kenny.**

**So no one was able to guess who's bullying Kenny yet! I'll reflect on some of the chapters then, mainly a pretty recent one. In that chapter, Kenny hinted the bully was someone who sat at his new table.**

**Yup.**

**Continuing on, this chapter's from Craig's point of view! I doubt anyone expected that. Yup, it contains some Creek, so hopefully you guys can deal with that. I love the side of Craig that he only shows to Tweek, it's so cute!**

**Oh right, did anyone detect that hint of Bendy a few chapters ago?**

**Getting off topic again... anyway, sorry for the short chapter, it was hard to write a lot in Craig's point of view.**

**Enjoy the chapter! Review your thoughts if you wish~**

_**[Chapter 19 - Bottom of Things]**_

* * *

"What if he almost gets killed again, but then it misses him and hits me? Oh dear God, what if it hits you?! Gah, I don't know what I'd do! This is too much pressure!"

"Tweek, calm down. Nothing like that will happen, you're just over thinking things again."

"We're going to die...!" I rolled my eyes, he was being all paranoid again, not like that was unusual.

"We've hung out with him in the past, why would we suddenly die from it now?"

"We're only lucky we're alive...!"

"Tweek, seriously, nothing's going to kill you. I wouldn't let any of it get past me anyway, it'll be okay."

"T-then what if you get hur-" I grabbed him by his shoulders, which immediately silenced him.

"You don't know how to calm down, do you?" Under my touch, he had frozen.

"I-I'm sorry, C-Craig..." I only laughed at his reaction, leaving him with a confused expression on his face.

"Do I really still seem so scary to you?"

"Kind of..." I smiled and leaned closer to him.

"Want to cut class together? We're already pretty late anyway."

"Gah! What if we get caught? That's too much pressure, man!" He began to shake again.

"Don't worry, I haven't been caught before, so I doubt it'd happen now." I pecked him on the lips to reassure him, and while blushing, he calmed down and nodded in agreement.

I thought I heard footsteps earlier, but they seem to have stopped. Just in case someone was there or watching us, I flipped off the direction which I heard them. Afterwards, I started walking away with Tweek.

I think I just saw Stan in the corner of my eye.

Dammit, this was supposed to be kept a secret.

* * *

Stan stopped me on my way to lunch, my immediate reaction was to flip him off.

"Yeah, yeah, I know." He sighed and gave me a serious look. "Dude, why are you hiding whatever's going on between you and Tweek?"

"Why do you think we were hiding it?" I'm not going to let him get answers out of me that easily. Plus, it's more fun to piss him off first.

"You two were in a hallway no one goes into that often."

"Then why were you there?"

"God dammit, will you just answer the question?"

"Maybe I don't want to."

"Fuck you!" He started walking away. Well, that was amusing.

"This school is filled with homophobes... and fangirls, not a very good place for homo couples. Listen, I know that rumor about you and Kenny is fake, and whoever made it probably just wanted to cause trouble for you two, but you still have to watch out. They always target the weaker ones when it comes to the bottom of things. Answering your question, I don't need the trouble, or for Tweek to become more paranoid than he already is." With that, I started walking away. I hope Kenny will be okay.


	20. Guardian Angel

**Thanks TechnoFool, Starlight-blood-flower, The Starkiller, ben4kevin, and XxBlindXxAngelXx for reviewing! I'm glad I brought forth some Creek fans~**

**Well, we all knew this was coming. I mean, most of you when looking at the chapter title were probably like, 'Mysterion Returns?!' Sadly, no. Karen just got some time in a chapter for once and they talk about him a little. Anyway, the_ other_ time has come! Kenny's bully is revealed!**

**On that note, I won't keep you. Go on, read, review. You know, the usual.**

_**[Chapter 20 - Guardian Angel]**_

* * *

Kenny's late again... He hasn't been for almost all week. I've been wandering around the school searching for him, but I can't seem to find him...

"Faggot, you should be _thanking_ me. At least now you don't have to hide that you love him." Is that... Clyde? How dare he call him that! The sound of a fist colliding with something echoed throughout the empty hallway.

Kenny!

"Attention _whore_." How dare he...! I quietly made my way over to where the voices were coming from. When I got there, I saw Kenny being pinned against a locker with his eyes closed, and Clyde about to punch him.

So I hit him first.

"You better not fucking _touch_ him again!" I kicked him in the leg and he fell to the ground. I kept kicking. "You piece of shit! If I'd known it was you who was hurting him earlier..."

"Stan...!" Next thing I knew, Kenny was hugging me. I was able to snap out of it as a result.

"Kenny... Are you okay? Why didn't you tell me it was him earlier?"

"So-sorry..." My eyes widened at the word. He had learned how to say it himself recently, and I hated every time he felt the need to use it...

"Please don't say that." I glanced over to where Clyde was in case he was listening; he was gone. "Bastard got away..." I sighed and gently wrapped my arms around Kenny to comfort him. "I'll tell Token what happened; he might know how to deal with Clyde. I don't think I can be near the guy right now and Token seems to be the most level headed of your friends."

"Stan..." He buried his face into my chest and I could feel my jacket start to get a little damp. He must be crying... Is there anything I can do to cheer him up?

"Hey Kenny... It's the weekend now, isn't it? You want to go pick up Karen and do something together?" I felt him nod.

We decided to go to the new diner that opened up in town. I was kind of glad since Kenny hadn't eaten lunch again today. At least he won't be able to refuse eating in front of Karen.

I thought that, but he still hasn't touched his plate.

"Then he jumped down and beat her up!" Karen didn't seem to notice the fact; she was too busy telling me about her 'guardian angel'.

I smiled. Kenny's so kind...

"I haven't seen him in a while though... Do you think something happened?" Kenny looked up from his plate of food which he'd been staring at. Of course I'd be asked this question...

"Maybe he just ran into some of his own problems he had to deal with? I'm sure he'll be back. From what you've told me, I don't believe he'd just forget about you." I smiled to her, and she seemed satisfied with the answer. I think I saw Kenny smile faintly too.

"Karen, do you want to use my cell phone to call Red?" She nodded.

"Thanks Stan... for buying us dinner." Which Kenny still hasn't eaten. Whatever, I was at least able to get it wrapped to try and give him later.

"It was nothing, I'm just glad you agreed to come along." Kenny seemed happy we were getting along well too. "Do you need anything from home?" She shook her head.

"No, I have some clothes at her house." Okay, at least that keeps us from having to go back into the house...

"Stanley, where were you? You missed dinner." Oops, I forgot to call her, didn't I?

"Sorry mom, Kenny and I went to a dinner with his sister and ate there."

"Oh, was it that new diner that opened up? I was going to go with your father to try it out. How is it?"

"It was fine, mom." She's going to start droning on now, isn't she?

"That's good to hear. Is that all you did? You were gone for quite a while." It begins... Truthfully, it wasn't all we did. We were at Stark's Pond for a while beforehand so I could calm Kenny down. If I tell her that, she'll start asking way too many questions though... I sighed and Kenny looked like he was trying to hold back a smile.

He's enjoying this, isn't he?


	21. 5 Seconds

**Thank you TechnoFool, ben4kevin, and random for reviewing. TechnoFool, I figured I gave it away with that, Token's too nice. Ah, and ben4kevin, that's so cruel! ...I respect you. As goes for random, I doubt you're even up to this chapter yet, but I'll thank you anyway for you to read it in the future. It's so nice to hear your thoughts on every chapter! I shall also thank GlacierGrimm for following!**

**I recently noticed that I've been giving all the people in my fanfics the personality of each of my Sympathyloids... no wonder why I get so into the writing. For this one, Stan's a lot like Hikaru Takeo, Kenny's like Isao Katashi, Clyde's like Umi Makoto, and Token's like Sakura Makoto. It seems I can never get away from them... Ah, so if you like this story, then you'll probably like all my future songs and stuff about them too.**

**Anyway, back to the story. I need to thank a friend of mine [who doesn't have a nickname yet] for helping me with information on the disorder. I've read about it a lot previously, but that was last year, so I obviously forgot.**

**That was long... You may now continue to the story, and please leave a review!**

_**[Chapter 21 - 5 Seconds]**_

* * *

"Kenny, please eat _something_." I looked up at him. He doesn't know it wasn't only Clyde hurting me now... After that rumor spread, right at the beginning of lunch, more would come to beat me up. At first they were only looking at me, which everyone else was doing, so I paid no mind, but recently...

They beat me up because I was gay...

I'm not even gay though! They should know that after how I used to be! At most... I'm bi.

What happens if they find me over the weekend? If they start calling me more than just gay, like things Clyde would say...

"You know I can't let you start to not eat enough. You're starting to lose weight again; you had finally gotten to a healthy one too..."

"Sor..." I stopped myself before saying the rest of the word. He told me not to say that anymore... He took a deep breath and looked straight at me.

"If you don't eat it yourself... I'm going to have to feed it to you." Feed it to me...?! "5..." Am I only getting 5 seconds to comply? He's serious?! "4..." I don't want to though... What if they use it against me? "3..." He nervously held up the fork full of food. "2..." I don't have a choice, do I? "1." He forced the fork into my mouth and I swallowed without realization.

He just fed me... I felt my face heat up. This is more blush than usual... Is it true then? These off feelings... is it really what they said? Do I really... love him?

"K-Kenny... You're blushing..." I can tell, he's blushing a little too... We sat in silence, both having no idea what to say.

Finally, that silence was broken... by his cell phone.

"God dammit..." He checked it. "That's Token, that means I have to take it. I'm sorry, Kenny..." I solemnly nodded.

I don't mind... that call just saved us from that awkward moment.

"Hello?" I heard a tiny voice come from the phone, then there was a short silence. "He's seriously crying?" That was... to be expected. I heard him mutter something similar to, 'To think a person like him actually has the ability to hurt someone...' His voice returned to its regular volume. "Why the fuck is he crying?" Another tiny reply, this one was a lot longer. "Well then..." He sighed and blocked the phone with his hand, looking at me. "Body Dysmorphic Disorder."

What? Is that... some sort of illness?

He removed his hand from the phone.

"Yeah, I guess that's a reasonable explanation... but he still didn't have to use Kenny." I'm confused... "Update me if he says anything else." I waited for him to hang up. "Bye." He did so and looked over at me. "Kenny, you look seriously confused."

Well, I am.

"Ah, is it about the Body Dysmorphic Disorder?" I nodded. "How to explain it... Well, it's a mental illness. Normally if a person sees a flaw in themselves they're not bothered by it too much, but people with this illness are bothered all day by it. They go to the extent of staying away from other people, and hiding themselves because of it. The only real way to escape their thoughts is with distractions... I believe he was using you as one." He stopped. "You think it might have been caused by us making fun of him when we were younger?"

Could we have really caused something like that...?

"Wow, I feel kind of guilty now..."

Me too..."

"Token didn't say that was it himself, but what he said sounded like the symptoms."

Wait, since when did Stan know about these things?

"Kenny, why're you looking at me like that?" He seemed to remember something. "Oh right... I didn't tell you about my schedule change... I switched to a psychology class."

"W-wh-why...?" At least words are getting easier to learn. By the look on his face, he wished that I hadn't just learned that one.

"I... switched classes for you. I had hoped it would help me figure out inside your head, and it did. However, it wasn't that much help..."

You switched a whole class for me?

"Stan..." I hugged him and he returned the favor.


	22. Limited Vocabulary

**Thank you for reviewing TechnoFool, diamondangels, and ben4kevin! I shall also thank diamondangels once again for following~**

**I have reasoning for this really late update! This was originally what was supposed to happen in Chapter 23. The original Chapter 22 will probably end up somewhere, somewhere else. Whether it's in my future Tyde story, or just a later chapter, it'll be somewhere.**

**With that said, yes, I did have to write a whole other chapter. Hopefully it was worth the wait!**

**For those of you confused, this is a few weeks after the last chapter. Kenny's over Craig's house because, well, they're friends. It's normal to go over your friend's house. Friends that live nearby anyway.**

**Enjoy the chapter my puppets! Leave a review too! I have a feeling all the reviews will be about how I ended this chapter though...**

_**[Chapter 22 - Limited Vocabulary]**_

* * *

He said we were going to talk, but we never did. Why didn't we? What if he's just trying to avoid the subject? What if it's because he's going to reject me...?

Oh God, I'm starting to sound like Tweek with all these 'what if's.

I guess it wasn't exactly a confession; it was more of a realization... but why does he seem to be keeping a distance from me at school now? If I'm not just over-thinking things, then there must be something wrong.

I really hope I'm over-thinking things...

"Kenny, what's wrong? You look stressed." Should I tell Craig? Well, he's my friend, so I guess so...

"Stan..."

"What the fuck did he do?"

"N-noth-nothing...!" Wait, maybe that's the problem. I sighed. He hasn't done anything...

Craig blankly looked at me.

"Then what aren't you telling me?" I remained silent and he continued to stare. "You're not getting out of answering." That means there's no way to avoid telling him... He hates Stan though! How is he going to react? Actually, how do I even word it? I'm stuck with only one word sentences. Adding to that, they can't even be very long...

"C-con-confessed..." Is that... shock I see on his face? He's actually showing an expression?!

"He actually confessed? I didn't think he had the balls to..." He thinks Stan confessed? Ah, I did word it that way, didn't I? Wait, he said that as if he knows something! "Wait, why are you all stressed from that? Did you reject him or something?" He's got it mixed up, it's the other way around...!

Dammit limited vocabulary!

I shook my head. It's not like I can say a new word every time I'm asked a question. Too bad too... This is ending horribly.

"Then what did happen between you two?" Um, any words I already know that I can use?

My cell phone rang and saved me from the awkward situation. We both looked over at it. The caller ID said, 'Stan'...

"You going to answer it?"

I nodded and picked up the phone.

"Stan...?"

"I'm coming to pick you up, why didn't you tell me you were at Craig's house?"

I must have forgotten to...

"Sorry..." Ah, I forgot I'm not supposed to say that anymore! I heard him sigh on the other end.

"I should be there in a few minutes, okay? Make sure to be ready." He hung up.

He's been acting strange since then, hasn't he? How come I only noticed this now...?

I put the phone down and Craig looked at me.

"What did he want?" Um... I pointed to the door.

"You're leaving?" Wow, he was actually able to understand that? I nodded. "See you at school then." I nodded again.

I'm surprised he's not mad or anything. Well, he could just be hiding his emotions again...

The doorbell rang. I was about to leave, but Craig answered it before I could. He said something to Stan, but I couldn't understand it... Then he turned to me.

"You going?" He was the one who was just talking to Stan before I could!

I nodded a little in response, but also as a goodbye. Then I made my way out the door, and followed Stan down the pathway.

"I would ask you why you were there, but I know you can't tell me..." He sighed. "Next time please tell me where you are... I was looking for you and was really worried..." I didn't mean to worry him... Why was he looking for me though? "I'm glad you're okay, it was like you just disappeared." He laughed a little. "I guess that's because you never really go anywhere by yourself..."

What Craig thought is really bothering me now...

"Kenny, you're not responding at all... Are you okay?"

I can't take this anymore, Stan! I just need to know...

I kissed him, using all the courage I could muster. Please Stan... Give me an answer. Even... if you're going to reject me. I just need something.


	23. To Be Found

**Thanks for reviewing ben4kevin, The Starkiller, and TechnoFool! Glad you all liked the last chapter.**

**I think I just dug my own grave...**

**I have shattered any hopes and dreams of happiness...**

**You'll understand my rambling soon...**

**Here's the next chapter everyone's been waiting for! Don't forget to review... I really want to see what you guys say about this one.**

_**[Chapter 23 - To Be Found]**_

* * *

He's_ kissing _me_. _Oh God,_ what is going on? How did this even happen?! What am I supposed to do?!_

I want to kiss back so badly, but...

If this continues, he's going to get hurt again at school. I can't let that happen, I have to protect him. It's okay, I have to put my desires aside... I have to do this, even if it hurts him in the process, because that's the only way to protect him, right?

He pulled away and looked at me. I could tell he was hurt. I hate knowing the fact that I was the one to cause that...

"Sorry... Stan..." His eyes teared a little as he slowly backed away from me and ran.

"Kenny..." Is it really worth it? Is how much I just hurt him really not as bad as what will happen in school? At least he'll be able to get over this, but I can't have people beating him up every day because of me...

I... I can't take it though!

I ran after Kenny. Following the direction he had gone, I searched everywhere. He was nowhere to be found. At this point, I was even hoping to find his body, just to feel the guilt of what I caused, because I deserved it. Even if I find his body, I'll at least now where he is, and where he'll be tomorrow...

Why didn't I go after him sooner? If I at least did that, he wouldn't hate me...

I haven't seen Kenny in school at all today... Is he avoiding me, or is he just not here? I feel so horrible for doing that to him...

This is all my fault...

* * *

I decided to not go to lunch; I'd rather wander around the halls to see if I can find him. I know he definitely won't show up to lunch anyway.

I don't think I need any of his friends beating the shit out of me for what I did either... Although, I deserve it.

* * *

He's not answering his phone, I don't know how much longer I can stand not even knowing where he is and what state he's in.

I hurried over to his house and found that he wasn't there. Maybe he just stayed out late? He doesn't really have anywhere to go though...

* * *

I have to make sure he's in at least a stable condition; I don't care that it's 3am. He wasn't there earlier... so he has to be there now.

I snuck out while my family was sleeping and ran to his house. His room's lights are off. Has he gone to sleep? Well, that would be logical.

I could see his parents downstairs though, and they're fighting. Normally he wouldn't leave his sister alone to deal with that...

I walked right through the front door and they didn't seem to notice me, that, or they didn't care.

Thank God I'm not a murderer or something.

I made it to Kenny's room and turned on the lights.

"I'm sorry, Kenny. I just had to-" His bed is empty. Where is he...?! I began to panic a little.

Could he have not come home? Has he really been out for this long?! I searched his room for something, _anything_, that could possibly help me find where he could have gone.

Nothing.

Kenny... I'm so sorry.

I know I've told you so many times not to use that word, but at times like this, it's necessary.

This is all my fault. It's obvious you're probably not as mentally okay as before now, but are you even physically okay?

I'm so worried... Wherever you are, please come back.

I'll hold you and comfort you, whatever you want me to do for you. Anything. Just _please_ come back...


End file.
